Friday, April 23, 2010

Let's just be honest...

What happens when you do not tell the truth? Well, this has been somewhat of a problem with my beautiful little girl. In fact, we had a long long long talk about it just a week ago. You know it went something like this, if you do something wrong and you tell the truth, you will most likely still get in trouble, but if you lie about it and we find that out and trust me we always do, the punishment will double. Sound familiar? Anyway, had a pretty good week no real issues with dishonesty til last night. We were about 15 minutes from home and she announces she has to "go" bad. Now she had just had an opportunity to go potty so you know how that goes. There is also no place to stop on the way home from Jon's school. I tell her she will have to hold it thinking this is clearly a lesson in being more assertive on the need to pee scale! My favorite line when they announce an emergency need to pee is when you ask why they didn't go 5 minutes ago when you asked if they needed too and there was a bathroom and they say, "I didn't have to go then!" oh baloney!!!

Anyway, judging from the sitting pee pee dance she was doing in her seat I had to wonder if she actually made it to the bathroom or tinkled on the way, so I asked her. This was her opportunity to tell me what happened...but she chose the low road. I made it, she says, looking guilty as all get out and the fact that her panties were on the floor were all indications she was not being honest. So I gave her another shot, "wow you made it all the way home and didn't even go a little in your panties?" Again she denies it, but sees me looking at them on the floor so says, "I dont' know if I did or not" oh now come on, (insert a good eye roll here)So I ask her again, "did you or did you not potty in your panties?" Again she plays the I dont' know card. So I picked them up...well unless she is going to further dig her self into a lying pit and tell me she accidentally poured water on them it is obvious she didn't quite make it (by the way, glad she didn't try that). So she gets the I'm very disappointed in you for not being honest, and how am I going to be able to trust what you tell me and the whole punishment thing again. I told her I was going to have to find some suitable punishment for lying. I also told her I was asking if she had made it so I could take care of her pants then before bed so they didn't sit with pee in them because that is one bad smell. I wasn't upset with her, at least not until she lied to me. So she has been on the hunt for a pair of sandals she can wear to school, which means they have to have a strap on the back. We looked last night, but without a lot of success. She has almost even convinced me to take her this evening to get a pair. Well, now her punishment is waiting to get sandals for one week. Unless of course, she lies between now and then and then it will get pushed farther and farther away. The reality that punishment set in this morning as she said, it sure would be nice to have sandals to wear. I love it when she gives me the opportunity to remind her of things. She got a little weepy eyed, but that didn't last long because I really didn't want to start her day off in tears. There was a quick reminder that this was her own doing, and she had the ability to make this a week or much much longer. We also talked about asking for forgiveness when we lie, and that we can ask Jesus to help us be honest if lying seems easier. She also got the reminder that there is nothing she could do that would make me not love her, that I would love her for forever and then some, but that I wanted to know I could trust her when she told me things. I know I need to handle this now, so that as we hit those ugly teen years we have a good foundation of honesty and being able to tell me anything.

Bless your heart if you made it this far.

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